My View of Life - Never Better!

My Valentine

I hope to speak for men everywhere on this day of love--Valentine's Day. I've often pondered verses of scripture found in Genesis: It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; and made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

It is not good that man should be alone: Throughout my life, I've heard these comments from my friends. "Man, I don't know where I'd be without my wife. I'd probably be indulging in who knows what type of sin."

And he took of his side...a rib: Our Father in Heaven didn't take a bone from his foot that he might trample her. Not from his head that he might abuse her, or use her in any control, unclean, or unwholesome fashion. But it was from his side, that she might be to him what she is, helpful, loving, kind, caring, supportive, comforting, and on and on are the qualities she can give.

An help meet: I first recognized what "help meet" meant, shortly after Lisa and I were married 32 years ago. I was nearing the completion of my nursing degree. I wasn't enjoying it. I was newly married, and had a brand new baby girl. I had family and church responsibilities, and I lacked balance. Nevertheless, I would finish the program no matter what. That's the way I've always been. If I start something noble, I'll finish it. However, I had a teacher that misinterpreted my efforts. She figured I wasn't the nursing type, and would be miserable in the profession. She asked me to repeat a semester. The news was devastating to me. My cries were heard by my mother 500 miles away. She called wondering if I was o.k.

I worked through my feelings and decided the teacher was right. Truly I was miserable, although I was doing as well as anyone else in the program. It didn't make sense. But I decided she was right. Lisa didn't see it that way. Her insight was better than mine. We were called into a meeting with the teacher. She explained what she saw, and I acknowledged I wasn't enjoying the program. She said that I would be better served as a grocery store manager or some other field. I stupidly agreed, but my acceptance was deeply troubling--deep down I knew she was wrong. Only then did I realize the power I had in my corner. Lisa spoke up. She was 20 years old, and the teacher...maybe late 60s. She called her bluff. The two of them got in an argument. The teacher used her age, tenure, and position to knock her down. It didn't work. Lisa became stronger and let her know what she'd done, and that she had misjudged me. The meeting ended. The teacher was upset, Lisa was upset, and I marveled at who I now was.

I learned over the years that nursing was a perfect fit for me. It's me through and through. I find endless fulfillment, joy, pleasure, and gratitude in my field. It's rewarding and comfortable for me. Lisa was right. She went to bat for her husband, and she hit a home run.

My anchor: Perhaps I could speak for women now. I know a few. I've been married to Lisa for 32 years, I have two amazing daughters and an amazing daughter-in-law, my angel mother, two fantastic sisters, and I've worked with mostly women for 26 years.

How does Lisa do it? I've come to know that it's her nature. Every moment of every day she's been faithful to me. Forever obedient to the commandments, and strong in the defense of truth. Integrity is the word that suits her. Her diligence in righteous doing assists me. It keeps me grounded, and provides me proper perspective. I too strive to be ever more faithful and obedient. I gladly add what all my friends have said. "Who knows where I'd be without her." To righteous women everywhere. I think the devil says this each time you wake up--"oh no, she's awake again."

Her guiding principle is self sacrifice. However, you'd never know it because it's natural, and she goes about her day with an attitude of that's just how life is. She spends her days making every effort to help me. She puts me first, and somewhere in there she may hope to fit herself in. For example, my health is in question. She spends countless hours studying ways to help me maintain optimum health. The best foods, enough sleep, proper exercise, and on and on. It would work if I'd just listen. I do try, but I'm so driven. For instance with my novel, I slept just a few hours a night for months until I got it submitted to my editor.

She knows that I can't financially support us on one income. She's a registered nurse as well. Without her, the experiences our whole family cherishes, would not have been available for us. She desires nothing lavish. There always needs to be some money left to help enrich the lives of the family.

I'm no longer me, I'm 54. With Lisa at my side we have four children, three children-in-law,and eight grand children. I've always been amazed with her motherhood. I've come to know this as I witness the qualities she instilled in my daughters. The word that comes to mind is--divine nature. Always giving, always nurturing, always listening...always comforting. Truly the woman is the heart of the home--truly she strengthens home and family. I marvel at the strength my daughters give their husbands, and my daughter-in-law gives to my son. This virtue was Lisa's priority since she was a little girl. Now, so many decades later, she has blessed me to have joy that I never could have comprehended, and never could have imagined, with my family. They are my life--they are me.

As for me. I'm resilient. However, God gives us all challenges we can't overcome--hence, he provided a Savior for us. And for the man, he provided a help meet. Some of my challenges have suppressed me. I could lose sight of the goal, stumble, or even give up. An example of what Lisa does for me occurred last Sunday in choir practice. I was struggling with the tenor part. The flats and sharps were too much for me. I was frustrated. But, all of a sudden, I started hitting them. It was miraculous! I looked to my side, and Lisa was singing the tenor part with me. She can sight read and sing like none other. I quit singing. I had to because tears were pouring down my face. This is what our Heavenly Father planned for his children. I can and will succeed because my loving Father took from my side--a rib and gave it to the woman.

Tribute: To all the valentines around the world. In my novel I wrote this phrase: There is nothing in this world that compares to motherhood. There is no greater influence, no sweeter spirit, and no greater love and concern that can be conveyed in any fashion than that of a mother. I echo that advice for your wife and help meet. Truly the problems of our country and the world could be solved with this simple remedy--the mother and help meet. Put the mother and wife in the equation--helping and nurturing the children to grow up acquiring habits of virtue, love, faith, kindness, forgiveness, and integrity, and supporting her husband to stand true and faithful to righteous principles...problem solved.